10 Things Rui Felt
by Peachy Hikaru
Summary: 10 things that Makino made Hanazawa Rui feel. Follows the Jdrama, from the first season to the movie. Massive spoiler alert if you are intending to watch it! Canon ending.


**Apathy**

It was clear in his actions, in the lack of expression on his perfect face as he watched the proceedings. There wasn't the amusement that Soujiroh displayed, or the passing concern that Akira was showing on his face as he watched Tsukasa beat up the poor sod who had accidentally gotten a drop of orange juice in his eye. Hanazawa Rui did not care. He was… bored, even.

Finally, he couldn't take it any more. Yawning, he picked up the book he was reading and walked away. Why did people continuously make the same mistakes over and over? Being careless around Tsukasa, crowding around the F4 like they were gods… why did they care? He knew he didn't.

Unbeknownst to him at the time, there was a pair of eyes following him in admiration as he strolled off to the fire escape stairs for a nap - and in that instant, his life was changed.

* * *

**Annoyance**

"UNBELIEVABLE!" The scream jolted him out of a sound slumber, and he slowly drew the book down, peeking upwards to see who was screaming her head off in his special spot, disturbing his nap.

Then again, he didn't really need to see who it was to know. Makino Tsukushi, that little commoner girl who was getting Tsukasa all worked up in a frenzy. He had to hand it to her, though, not many people had the guts to stand up to Tsukasa – the only person who'd done it so far was his sister, Tsubaki.

Still, the commoner girl had disturbed his nap, and he stood up and walked towards her, making his presence known. "This is my spot, please find somewhere else to relieve your stress," he told her coldly, before walking away from the fire escape.

* * *

**Anger**

"Please, stay! For Hanazawa Rui's sake!" he heard the words but didn't really believe what he was hearing was true. What the hell was the commoner thinking? Was this how they did things in her world?

He peeked around the corner to see Makino kneeling on the ground – kneeling! Her outrageous conduct made his blood boil. How dare she? He turned and walked out of the house, waiting at the front door to confront her about it.

"What the hell was that? It wasn't your place to ask her to stay! I didn't bring you here to make a fool of yourself." His harsh words shocked her, he could see, as she jolted upright.

"But Hanazawa Rui – you were so sad, and…"

His cold, angry words silenced her. "It wasn't your place." He could see the torment on her face as he rejected her gesture. "Leave!" He wanted to punish her, to hurt her as he had been hurt, to show her how unacceptable her behaviour was.

She ran off, crying, and he bent down, squatting in front of Shizuka's house, his once-nonexistent emotions a mess. How could she? How could she make such a fool of herself, making unreasonable demands of Shizuka? How could she simply open her mouth and ask for what he wanted most in the world?

"Damn you," he muttered, scowling.

* * *

**Amusement**

Watching the spectacle unfolding on the huge screen in front of the audience, Hanazawa Rui couldn't help but smile. The 'commoner girl' Makino Tsukushi had somehow managed to captivate the entire audience in a way that was completely foreign to the TOJ competition. Her uninhibited, unreserved interaction with the children was a novelty.

Although not completely surprised by the way the 'mini F4' had taken to her (after all, the real F4 had wholly accepted her into their fold) he was still amused by the way she'd gotten them to accept her. Her annoyed "Don't be so full of yourselves!" had brought back memories from earlier in the way, and the boisterous way she was running around with mini F4 was almost enough to make him wish that he had been in a position to enjoy a childhood like the one she had clearly had, carefree and rambunctious.

The adorable way she was playing with the children, acting completely as their equal, made for a very amusing picture, as she ran around chasing them, in a way that he had never seen an adult do. The sheer fact that it was Tsukushi, who treated them all like spoilt little children, who was playing around like a child, made the entire scene very heartwarming and he could feel the smile tugging at his lips, the laughter bubbling out of his throat.

* * *

**Anticipation**

Getting into his gorgeous new white convertible, Hanazawa Rui grinned. This was his maiden drive with his new license, and he knew exactly where he wanted to go, and with whom.

Driving up to Eitoku High, he almost missed the figure of Tsukushi walking out of the school, her school bag in one hand and her cute little lunch box in the other. He reversed a little and looked at her out the passenger's side window of his car. "Yo," he said nonchalantly, his small smile belying the bubbling anticipation he felt at seeing her again.

Although they still hung out frequently, she was still the one he came to most often with news and anecdotes of his life. It wasn't just that she was at the high school section of Eitoku, while he was at the university, making it convenient for him to find her for a meal or a conversation. He had to admit that some part of it was that Soujiroh and Akira were busy now, Soujiroh with his business classes and the events he attended, and Akira with… whatever Akira was doing as a Yakuza heir.

He actually liked coming to talk to her, enjoyed listening to her and watching the emotions play across her features, enjoyed the muttered "unbelievable!" she would still say sometimes when he told her some outrageous thing that he, or the other F4 members, had seen or done.

And, above all, he looked forward to every moment he could spend with her, anticipating the moment where he was free to seek her out again to relieve the mundane existence that he lived. The fact that she was basically the highlight of his life was something that he didn't bother thinking about.

* * *

**Fear**

Until that point, Hanazawa Rui was pretty sure he'd never felt true fear before. Nervousness, yes, but this level of fear that gripped your soul with icy fingers and left you breathless with panic? Not so much. It was hard to feel fear when nothing you truly cared about was ever really at risk of disappearing permanently.

But now, as he saw Makino on the ground, with a group of American thugs advancing menacingly on her, he felt fear. Fear for Makino, and fear for what was happening inside himself. This swell of unnamed emotion in him was something he had never experienced before. He directed the troublesome surge of emotion into anger, and threw the basketball at the thugs with more force than he probably should have.

As they turned around and glared at him, the fear lifted from his heart. "Leave. Her. Alone." The clearly enunciated words hung in the air, sharp like crystal and hard like flint. They were no longer threatening Makino, so there was no reason to be fearful. The fact that he was their new target wasn't cause for concern, either – after all, he had spent a lifetime as Tsukasa's best friend and part of F4. Violence and thugs were practically a part of his everyday life. He could hold his own against these losers – not that he would have to.

Once he held the water gun up to the forehead of the assumed leader of the group of thugs, he knew it was over.

"Get out of here!" he shouted at them, smiling as they basically fell all over themselves in an effort to leave hastily. They deserved it, after all, for threatening Makino and invoking that mysterious flood of emotion in him – something that he had never had to deal with before Makino burst into his life, screaming "Unbelievable!"

* * *

**Joy**

Somehow, it felt wrong to be so happy when everything around him was going awry. Even though Makino stood in front of the F3, smiling at them in excitement, he knew that she had to be feeling pain at the demise of the relationship she had with Tsukasa.

Even now, he winced as he thought of the harsh way Tsukasa had spoken to Makino. He hadn't been there when she went to confront him at the college, but from what she'd told them, Tsukasa had been cold and cruel. Added to the dismissive, annoyed way he'd responded when the rest of the F4 went to talk to him about Makino, Hanazawa Rui could only imagine that their relationship was over.

Although he felt a little pang of regret for their failed relationship, it was overridden by the joy he felt that finally Makino was free. Free for….

Come to think of it, what did he feel for Makino? What was the happy, squeezing feeling in his chest that he felt when she smiled at him like she was doing now? What was the fluttery feeling in his stomach that he got when she smiled at him? Why did she make him feel emotions to a depth that not even Shizuka had made him feel? Just being with her, now… it just made him so happy.

* * *

**Love**

And finally, he figured it out. The reason why he was so protective over Makino, even from his own best friend. The reason why he liked spending so much time with her, loved making her happy, loved seeing her smile.

Love.

Suddenly the paradigm seemed to shift, and what was once a fuzzy blur of nonchalance crystallized into perfect clarity.

He smiled to himself as he settled back onto the couch. The realization had come at such a strange moment, too. Makino had been denying that she still cared about Tsukasa and Shigeru, and then suddenly, they were falling on the couch, and he landed on her.

Thinking about that again, his face started to grow hot, not because he was embarrassed, but because… he'd _liked _it. Being all pressed up against her, having her face so close to his… it had been tempting to lean in for a kiss, but he couldn't.

Not yet.

* * *

**Hope**

Maybe this made him a bad person. Wait, on second thought, this _definitely_ made him a bad person. He wanted Tsukasa and Makino to both be happy, and it was starting to look as though they couldn't be happy together. So… was this his chance?

Seeing Makino so sad because of Tsukasa… on one hand, he wanted to take the pain away, but on the other… was it so wrong to think about his own happiness? It seemed that his happiness was linked irrevocably to Makino, and now that Tsukasa couldn't even remember Makino…

A little bit of hope sparked to life, illuminating his soul.

* * *

**That crazy mix**

It was hard to describe what he felt in that moment as he stood in front of Tsukasa and Makino – well, soon to be Mrs Domyouji.

There was joy, that the two of them had found their way back to each other after everything they had been through since their high school years, relief that they were safe after being stranded on the island for about six weeks, and incredulity that they had actually managed to make it work, despite all the obstacles they had been through.

Then, there was a whole range of less than pleasant emotions that he couldn't help but feel as well. Jealousy, because Tsukasa had won after all. Sadness, because he wanted so badly to be the one to stand there where Tsukasa was currently standing. Regret, because Makino had loved him first, and if he'd only gotten his act together, he could be standing next to her right now, and she could be Hanazawa Tsukushi instead of Domyouji Tsukushi. Wistfulness, at the thought of what might have been, of all that he could have had, if he had realized the defining moment of their relationship for what it was, and grabbed at it with both hands.

But seeing the happy smiles of his two favourite people in the world, he found that he could not be angry at them for their happiness. He was happy for them too, because they had found what they needed the most in this world.

And if all he could get from Makino was her happy smiles, then he would gladly accept them.

* * *

_Hi guys! Hope you enjoyed this short little fic hehe. I wanted to do this because I really love Hanazawa Rui's character, and Oguri Shun is like SO hot I can't even. I think it's such a waste that he only started liking her after she kind of moved on and was into Domyouji, and I think he knows it too, so I wanted to write this to kind of put into words the feelings he must have had towards the end of the series._

_As always, I love to hear from you guys, so please drop me a review and let me know what you think of this story!_

_Love,_

_Peachy Hikaru_


End file.
